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Are you a food nerd? - Cubangirl - 01-17-2013

Since I don't contribute that much in the way of recipes, I thought I'd bring you laughs. Here's a list from TOCIBB I found while looking for a lost recipe.

How to know you are a helpless food nerd...

1. You plan your day around the food network schedule.
2. People don't call you "a foodie" but you call yourself one.
3. You can name all of the french mother sauces.
4. You refer to Alton Brown as "AB"
5. You yell at the TV "It's TUR-meric NOT TOO-meric!" everytime a someone on TV says it wrong. Ditto for "marscapon"
6. You know what turmeric is.
7. People don't want to cook while you are watching.
8. You've paid more than $50 for a pan.
9. If you have ever made mayonnaise from scratch.
10. If you would like to have dinner with ANYBODY from Americas Test Kitchen.
11. You are wearing an apron while reading this. Bonus if you are a male.
12. You've gone on a culinary tour or vacation. Bonus if you went with people that you've never met in person before.
13. You've spent more money on kitchen utensils than on your entertainment center.
14. Your family insists on knowing every ingredient before they'll eat something that you made.
15. You check out other peoples appliances when you visit them.
16. You've cringed while watching someone cook.
17. You've set your kitchen up for perfect mise en place
19. You know what mise en place is.
20. You've special ordered meat. Bonus if it's over the internet.
21. You've seen the theme ingredient on the Iron Chef and said "OH! You know what I would make?!"
22. You have a "culinary garden"
23. You want to write your own cookbook.
24. You iron your apron.
25. You have read this entire list.
26. Even if you don't have anything in particular that you need to buy, going to the grocery store is to you is not only therapeutic, but it's a form of entertainment (like going to a museum). And you even visit grocery stores on vacation, just so you can see "what the locals have."
27. You absolutely cannot understand why people don't enjoy cooking.
28. You get palpitations when you discover you're down to only HALF a jar of your favorite dried spice.
29. You have gone into depression over a lost recipe.
29. You'd gladly pay more for a good knife than a winter coat.
30. The only other people that understand you are other food nerds.
31. You almost chop your finger with a cleaver and the first thing that comes to your mind is, "Whoa. I hope my knife's ok."
32. You go to bed at night thinking, "I can't wait to cook again tomorrow..."

And as for "tur-mer-ic" and "chi-pot-lay", please "sahn-toe-koo."and "mas-car-POH-neh."
They should make a drinking game out of mispronounced culinary words. Y'know, take a drink of your chardonnay or shiraz everytime you watch a food show and someone buthers the pronunciation. Or better yet, you have to take a sip every time Rachel Ray says "eee-voooo."


Re: Are you a food nerd? - DFen911 - 01-17-2013

Lol lol lol! I lost points for not wearing an apron because I took it off after dinner


Re: Are you a food nerd? - cjs - 01-17-2013

"29. You have gone into depression over a lost recipe." - Oh, let me count the times.

I'm not sayin' how many of these I relate to! But, I don't own an apron and haven't worn one since I retired from pro kitchens.


Re: Are you a food nerd? - Mare749 - 01-17-2013

I would love to have dinner with the people from America's Test Kitchen! Now they do some real cooking!


Re: Are you a food nerd? - Harborwitch - 01-17-2013

Better than 50% - I can really relate to some of them.


Re: Are you a food nerd? - Roxanne 21 - 01-17-2013

WHOA----I think about 70%------uh oh---

Definitely a food nerd---and proud!


Re: Are you a food nerd? - Gourmet_Mom - 01-17-2013

I relate to a bunch of these...LOL! WOW!


Re: Are you a food nerd? - Cubangirl - 01-17-2013

I got an invite to from ATK to tour and participate in some testing. I was so bummed that it came right after I left Boston. I told them to ask me again, so hopefully they will.Smile

I don't use aprons anymore unless I have to cook dressed up (e.g., last minute before company comes). I always used terry aprons with pockets, so I could wipe my hands. I tend to cook in spurts, so now I just plan on changing when I am done.

I don't lose recipes since I got LC, but still mourn losing my ex MIL knish recipe.

Barbara S suggested we add:

You post a picture of every meal you made.

but I can't edit any more


Re: Are you a food nerd? - labradors - 01-18-2013

Quote:

5. You yell at the TV "It's TUR-meric NOT TOO-meric!" everytime a someone on TV says it wrong. Ditto for "marscapon"



Do both of these - especially the latter - all the time. Also when "panini" is used as singular and "paninis" is used as plural. ("Panini" IS plural. "Panino" is singular.)

Oh, yeah: also "restauranteur." The place is the restaurant; the person is the restaurateur - NO "N"! "Restaurant" means "restorer" (a thing). "Restaurateur" means "one who restores" (a person). The latter was not just the addition of and ending to the modern meaning of the former.

Quote:

15. You check out other peoples appliances when you visit them.



Not their appliances - their spice rack.
Quote:

16. You've cringed while watching someone cook.



...or while watching someone's [lack of] knife skills.
Quote:

21. You've seen the theme ingredient on the Iron Chef and said "OH! You know what I would make?!"



Pffft! This group of forum users does it all the time - AND we set up our own mystery boxes!
Quote:

32. You go to bed at night thinking, "I can't wait to cook again tomorrow..."



More specifically, the many times I've gone to bed at night thinking, "Now, what if I combined _____ with _____ and, maybe, _____ ..."


Re: Are you a food nerd? - cjs - 01-18-2013

"More specifically, the many times I've gone to bed at night thinking, "Now, what if I combined _____ with _____ and, maybe, _____ ..."
-
Almost nightly